I usually like to keep everything very lighthearted at Chez Mrs. D but life can’t always be fun and games – not when there’s an important topic to be discussed.
Like almost everyone, I abhor all forms of abuse against another human being (yes and animals too!) but there’s something about narcissistic abuse that really hits a nerve with me. It’s because narcissistic abuse is something that has affected me personally. It’s because it has affected people I care about. It’s the reason why one of my schoolmates is no longer with us and why another one has serious emotional health issues. This is not a club I ever wanted to belong to but I found myself becoming a member without even realising what I was signing up to – which is quite often the case with people who have endured narcissistic abuse. And even though some of the emotional scars still remain, I’m definitely one of the lucky ones.
World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day
June 1st 2018 (tomorrow) marks World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day (WNAAD) an internationally recognized event that raises awareness of narcissistic abuse as well as providing education and resources for survivors. WNAAD was established in 2016 and now occurs on June 1st every year. It may only be two years old but WNAAD is a growing global movement and is committed to raising awareness of narcissistic abuse, and provides education, resources for survivors, and wants to take steps towards a change in policy.
Survivor Empowerment Telesummit 2018
An important part of World Narcissist Abuse Awareness Day in order to highlight the problem and raise the profile of narcissistic abuse is the commencement of a two day online summit, The Survivor Empowerment Telesummit 2018 where seventeen speakers – mental health practitioners and leading industry experts – will be giving advice and sharing insights.
What is narcissistic abuse?
Many people are still a little confused as to what exactly narcissistic abuse is. I plan to write a longer, more informative post on the subject but simply put it’s a form of psychological and emotional abuse. Unlike physical abuse which leaves visible cuts, bruises and broken bones, victims of any kind of emotional abuse wear their wounds on the inside – mentally and emotionally, hence why WNAAD came up with the hashtag, #IfMyWoundsWereVisible. That’s not to say that the abuse can’t later become physical but many of the abusers are often too clever, too charming and too subtle for that. Many people suffering from narcissistic abuse don’t even realise that what’s happening to them is a legitimate form of abuse. Somewhere down the line they may realise that something doesn’t feel right but can’t quite explain what and why. Family and friends will notice that something’s wrong but not know what it is or even how to help. For those of us who have endured narcissisitic abuse, we know just how awful, confusing and scary it is.
Why is it necessary to raise awareness of narcissistic abuse?
Narcissistic abuse is a problem that goes by undetected until it’s usually too late – but the epidemic of narcissistic abuse is escalating and I’ve seen that just with the people around me. But sadly there isn’t much in the way of education, campaign or funding to tackle this subject. According to the WNAAD website, studies indicate that between 1% and 6% of the population suffer from narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and that’s just narcissists alone – this statistic does not include the other cluster B disorders. It is estimated that in a lifetime, each individual suffering from NPD will have relationships with approximately five partners, thus highlighting the enormity and grave impact of this abuse. But although we know the number of people affected by NPD in one way or another is huge, it is difficult to calculate a near enough exact number. One thing that people often forget is that the narcissist isn’t always a partner: it could be a parent, child, or other family member, friend, housemate, or colleague – in short, it could be anyone.
Because the issue of narcissistic abuse is one that’s very close to my heart, I’m delighted that people are now talking about it and awareness is being raised because it gives the narcissist less place to hide and hopefully they’ll never cause pain or mental anguish to another human being again.
For those of you who are interested in the Survivor Empowerment Telesummit and wish to register you can do so at http://www.wnaad.com
All the other posts I’ve written so far with regards to this challenge have involved me having to express thanks to a particular person or for a certain thing. So at first, I wasn’t completely sure as to what I was expected to do here for week nine but I figured that I was being asked exactly what it says on the tin, and explain how I’ve done with this challenge so far and how I feel so far – so I will!
When I first heard of this challenge, I thought it was a great idea and I wanted to take part in it. I’ve always been a big believer in the power of gratitude and expressing thanks, and it shocks me just how ungrateful some people can be. It’s a sad fact that we live in a world where there is an ever increasing sense of self-entitlement. There are always feelings of wanting more no matter how much we have. And ‘thanks’ is a word that seems to be missing from a lot of people’s vocabularies these days. Just hold open a door for people or give up your seat on the bus for someone and you’ll see what I mean. So doing this challenge was a way to reinforce my existing sense of gratitude and also to see if I could learn more about myself.
As for how I did, well I think it’s fair to say that so far I haven’t done very well! After all this challenge should have been completed in 2017 but it’s now 2018 and I’m now only on week nine! I could very well have thrown in the towel and put this challenge into the bin consigned for challenges that didn’t work and very conveniently forgotten about it – but I would have hated that. Another thing I firmly believe in other than gratitude, is the philosophy of better late than never, so I’m more determined than ever to keep going and complete this challenge.
And in any case, I’m pretty sure there’s a parallel universe somewhere where it’s still 2017!